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The New Wedding

30 Dec
Queen Victoria

Queen Victoria

Whilst there have been some kick-ass weddings I have had the honour of attending, I keep circling to the thought that had I to do all over again, I would definitely elope. I was 24 when I married, and whilst I knew I didn’t want to get caught up in the trappings of a ‘traditional’ do, I wish I had delved deeper into the possibility of an elopement and all it would have meant for us. We loved our 80 guest morning high-tea celebration to bits, but being the woman I am now, I would definitely have made bolder choices, and these are some of my reasons:

By the time we celebrated our marriage in March, Mr. N and I were already married for two months because we tied the knot at Home Affairs. I would have just done the Home Affairs portion better. An incredible dress, photographer and amazing meal would have made me more happy than you know.

Weddings as we know them are themselves the heritage of non-conformists, as in the case of Queen Victoria’s marriage to Albert in 1840, Victoria insisted on donning a white dress instead of the traditional blue at the time.

For everything weddings are, they are still an expensive few hours. For everyone involved, guests included!

The only aspect of today’s traditional wedding that resonates with me is the coming together of a community to wish a new family well and celebrate an institution I love!

A Pinch of Salt is a blog about celebrating and supporting better alternatives, alternatives and practices that take into account the whole person. In the case of weddings, the person before, during, and after ‘the big day’. Too often, weddings are a heavy burden that are more trouble than they are worth. For couples with greater value in doing it differently, for whatever reasons.  For couples seeking a lighter load, I will be sharing on lighter weddings more often. If this is your vibe, follow along on Pinterest too.

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The Reality of Divorce

4 Jun
Image from A Practical Wedding

Image from A Practical Wedding

Before we were married, Mr.N and I spent many conversations discussing our deal breakers, our attitudes towards them and divorce. Since marriage I am even more struck by divorce, its roots, process and repercussions. The fact is divorce is a reality. It happens. Have you considered your attitude towards it? What it means, what would cause it in your own life and what you would do if faced with it. Off course, I would not wish divorce on any bright-eyed couple in love, but I do think it should be discussed more by everyone. Even dating couples and seriously by engaged ones. A Practical Wedding featured a beautifully captured account recently that I would like to share with you. This photographic journey of a young wife’s still early venture into divorce certainly got me thinking.

Small Wedding = House

17 Jan

How has your new year been so far? I hope you’re in a good place and have the same optimism I’m carrying around with me.

I often speak of priorities, and today I would like to expand on one of our biggest priorities and inspiration for this blog. Before we got engaged, my Husband and I would discuss our dreams and plans. Eventually, those dreams and plans expanded to involve a shared vision. When we started discussing marriage and our engagement, we went shopping for engagement rings and costing weddings. I quickly discovered that whilst I like big rocks as much as the next girl (maybe not as much, but certainly appreciate a pretty piece of jewellery), I was not comfortable spending that amount of money on it. We had already started dealing with our finances as a team (we did this fairly early on).

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We had been looking to purchase an investment property at this point, and realised that whilst we had been blessed with a good position to purchase our first property, getting a big engagement ring and throwing a lavish wedding, would put a sizeable dent in our buying capability. So we decided that we definitely wanted to be married and get ourselves a property as a wedding gift to ourselves instead of a big ring and wedding.

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We’ve been married and in our current house for three years and we are SO grateful for those early decisions. Next week I will share what that choice has afforded us, a look at our first home.

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Start with what You Know

11 Oct

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Marriage

8 Oct

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Image from wpja.com

A friend, Tania Oosthuizen, whose wedding was featured here , sent me a quote spoken at her wedding. I thought it was brilliant so here I share 🙂

“My uncle always said that to get married for sex is like flying business class for the peanuts” Pieter Koegelenberg

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